Funny Cheese Puns!

A page of cheese puns, jokes and humor on the subject of this magnificent foodstuff.

Cheesily pleased with puns?  Let's milk it.  Some of the puns are cheesy but no costs are in curd.

Is this page any good?  You cheddar believe it.

Let's cut the cheese and smell that fine aroma.   It's brielliant.

So if you are someone who likes pure cheesiness from start to finish, follow this whey to gorge yourself.

​Here are the puns.

Puns

biblical cheese - Edam and Eve, Cain and Babybel
cheese dog did a curd on the carpet

cheese rules the world - hallouminati

cheese worker had to move - it was a feta comply
​exploding cheese left a lot of de brie

in the city of cheese book a room at the Stilton

​inquiry into political cheeses will be biparmesan
militant cheese - Balsamic fonduementalist
no crackers, don't have Emmental breakdown

playing cheese tennis with a cheese ball and a raclette
retired cheese gave up the daily rind
said goodbye to cheese with fondue farewells

social network for cheese - the fetaverse
​the beta the feta, the less you regreta

ungrateful cheese - you ingrate

when deciding on a Welsh cheese - choose caerphilly

whey too much information, curd you be more specific?
won a cheese in the raffle - it was a quark of fate

​working lunch with an Apple Mac and cheese

Cheese Rolling Gifts >>

Expressions about Cheese

Big cheese - important person
Chalk and cheese - completely different things
Cheesy - corny, kitsch

Cheesed off - fed up, annoyed
Cut the cheese - break wind
Hard cheese - get over it

Famous People With Cheese Names

Brie-yonce - singer
John Cheese - Monty Python
Kim Curdashian - celeb

​Quark Gable - actor
Jane Fondue - actress and activist
​Stanley Kubrick - film director

​Kate Mozzarella - model
Jeremy Rennet - actor
Swiss Family Robinson - stranded on a dessert island
Paris Stilton - media personality

Cheese Jokes

A young cheese walks into a bar.  "You need to be more mature to get served in here" says the barman.

A cheese tried sitting on a piece of bread.  "You must think I'm crackers" said the bread.

When a lady cheese left the office they all sang "For cheese a jolly good fellow".

I had some bad cheese yesterday.  It was a Feta worse than death.

A man was squashed in between a piece of cheese and a tough looking fish.  He was stuck between a Roquefort and a hard plaice.

Big Cheese Gifts >>

Monty Python Cheese Shop Sketch

There can't be a mention of cheese without referring to the Cheese Shop Sketch by Monty Python.

A customer (John Cleese) tries to buy a variety of cheeses and the cheesemonger (Michael Palin) gives a series of different excuses for why each one is unavailable.

Customer: Can I buy some cheddar?
Cheesemonger: None left sir, the cat ate it

This continues for some time as John Cleese gradually loses it.

43 different cheeses are mentioned in the original sketch!

Movies and TV

Brie Encounter - 1945 romance by Noel Coward
​Curd Your Enthusiasm - Larry David
​East of Edam - John Steinbeck

Edam Busters - WWII
Feta Attraction - bunny fondue
Little Swiss Sunshine - losers can be winners too

​Pirates of the Carrie-Brie-an - cheesy Disney
The Gouda, the Bad and the Ugly - Western

Cheese Rolling

Gloucestershire Cheese Rolling is a British holiday activity that gets bigger each year thanks to social media and cheese.

People gather to chase rolling cheeses down a steep grassy hill.  

Fast food outlets, alcohol and a set of Bank Holiday merrymakers keep tradition live.

Ambulances are on stand by.

Cheese Puns Gifts >>

Social Cheeses

eBrie - for second hand cheese
FaceBlue - stay in touch 
Grater - meet like-minded cheeses

​InstaGruyere - cheese selfies
OnlyCheese - ooh those lovely cheeses
Rennet - Reddit for cheese fans

​StringChat - amusing pics of cheese
​WikiParmesan - lots of information

Songs

Camembert Necessities - Jungle Book
Cheese and Onions - The Rutles
Great Balls of Cheese - Jerry Lee Lewis

​Little Miss Muffet - curds and whey nursery rhyme
Take The Long Whey Home - Supertramp
My Whey - Frank Sinatra

Words for Making Cheese Puns

A handy set of words for making up your own cheese puns.

brie, caerphilly, camembert, cheddar, cheese, cheesecake, cheesy, cottage, curds, edam, emmental, feta, fondue, grate, gruyere, halloumi, mac and cheese, mozzarella, parmesan, quark, raclette, rennet, rind, stilton, string, swiss, whey

Roquefort Cheese Pun Gifts >>

The Last Crumbs

We finished all the cheese!

It was a lot to get through in a single sitting so try to stand up carefully.

If you need to open a window now is probably the time.

There is a lot more stuff on this site which has nothing to do with cheese.