If you need an excuse for being late to your workplace, this light-hearted collection of mostly plausible reasons might be of use.

Maybe it’s your third time this week, and the boss has already warned you about poor timekeeping, so you need a good reason fast.

Perhaps you overslept, or woke up in a bed that wasn’t your own. Maybe the police have just released you from an overnight stay in their cells.

There can be times when you don’t want to tell work the real reason you’re going to be, or were, late to the office.

My plan is to turn this page into a wiki-style A-Z of useful excuses for being late. With a bit of effort, it may become part of life lessons in school, giving pupils a head start on avoiding work wherever possible.

Here are a few odd reasons that don’t yet deserve their own section:
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• Thought it was Saturday
• Didn’t notice the time
• No offense, but could not be bothered

Below are some much better excuses, with the sections loosely organized from A to Z:

Helping others can serve as a noble excuse for your tardiness.
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• Helped a neighbor jump-start their car this morning
• Saw someone fall and stopped to assist them
• Rescued a lost dog and took it to the local shelter
• Helped an elderly person carry their groceries
• Gave a friend a ride because their car broke down

​Yep I know. I wouldn't buy it either.  But maybe your boss doesn't know you that well.

This excuse is ideal twice a year when the clocks either spring forward or fall back.
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You forgot to change them, or you moved them in the wrong direction. Easy mistake to make — though it may be less easy to convince your boss and colleagues.

You found out this morning that an important delivery is arriving at an unspecified time, and you had to wait in to receive it.

The old flat battery excuse used to mean your clapped-out car failed to start. You’d need to hand-crank it (very old cars) or borrow jump leads from a neighbor.
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As more people switch to electric cars, the flat battery excuse is about to stage a massive comeback in popularity.

There are countless potential pitfalls before you even open the front door. It’s amazing anyone makes it to work on time.

Leaky plumbing, electrical faults, boiler trouble, air conditioning failure, lift out of action, large spider in the bathroom.

Couldn’t find keys, wallet, glasses, laptop, shoes.

Been burgled (use sparingly).

You’ve been unwell recently, or this morning, which delayed you. Maybe you felt sick, and it’s passed.

Maybe you really were sick — but go easy on the details. Ideally, there’s something going around the office, and you can get a free pass.

​Despite this discomfort, you’ve managed to struggle in late. What a hero!

​Add the “I’ve not been feeling myself lately” line, and the ensuing good-natured banter should help you get away with it.

Kids are a great reason. Even the coldest-hearted boss has to pretend to care — much as you have to. Plus, they make you sound like you have a life outside of work.

A child can be ill, lost, naughty, late for school, or overdue on homework. They might refuse to eat, wash, dress, or brush their teeth. They can make your life hell.

​So, make the most of them. Have a lie-in, if you can.

Medical-related excuses tend to work because no one questions someone dealing with health issues.  
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• Had to go to the pharmacy to pick up urgent medication
• Sudden migraine or stomach pain this morning but it's passed now
• Had to attend an emergency doctor's appointment for a check-up
• My contact lenses irritated my eyes, and I couldn't drive
• Sprained my ankle rushing to get ready for work

Try not to get into conversations about your medical issues with concerned workers, if there are any.

Oversleeping is a good reason for being late, but it’s not much of an excuse to give to work. It makes you sound lazy, disorganized, and probably a drinker.

Blaming equipment is a reasonable excuse. Your alarm clock or iPhone failed to sound the alarm due to an unavoidable and catastrophic battery failure.

The cockerel had a morning off.

​Your partner, who normally wakes you, has gone to their mother’s for an unspecified amount of time.

Anyone in a relationship knows that despite your best efforts, misunderstandings can occur. A simple throwaway remark can result in extreme, and in my view quite unnecessary, over-reactions.

Your partner can be a perfect excuse for being late. It’s easier to lie about a third party having problems.

They lost their keys. They’re unwell — that sort of thing.  Blame them for everything and get a free pass from sympathetic colleagues.

If you’re in a happy relationship, well, lucky you and another possible excuse for lateness.  "Sorry I'm late, my partner was in an amorous mood this morning".

Pets are a handy excuse. They get lost or sick. They trash the place, mess on the floor, and may eat your travel card, wallet, or car keys.

They climb onto ledges and won’t come down. They get involved romantically or aggressively with the neighbor’s pet.

​Each of these problems can require a lot of time. Time that you would much rather spend reading work emails.

If you rely on public transportation, the potential for delays is endless.
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• Train strikes caused a mess with the schedule
• Bus broke down halfway through the journey
• Incident at train station meant services were delayed
• Missed my stop due to overcrowding and had to walk back
• Subway doors malfunctioned, and we were stuck for 20 minutes
• Lost my season ticket

Instead of moaning about the public transport system - put it to your advantage for once!

In our modern world, technology rules everything, so when it fails, you have a great excuse.
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• Wi-Fi went down, so I couldn’t check my route or work from home
• GPS glitch sent me in the wrong direction
• My car locked me out
• Traffic updates were delayed, so I got stuck in a jam
• The Uber app froze, and I couldn’t get a ride

Always use the word glitch.  It's what the tech people blame everything on.​

Transport troubles are one of the main reasons for being late. From losing your car keys to not finding a parking space, there’s a wide range of perfectly reasonable explanations for being up to three hours late.

• Traffic jams - top answer
• Flat tire, accident on the highway, road closures
• Stopped by traffic police for a missing tail light
• Speed or parking restrictions
• Roadworks or temporary traffic lights have caused havoc
• Missed a highway turn-off
• Neighbor blocked my car in

Use the difficulties and frustration of simply trying to get from A to B to your advantage for once.

Blaming the weather is a classic excuse. It’s an external factor, completely out of your control, and works for all seasons.
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• Heavy rain - flash flooding
• Snowstorm blocked my driveway
• Thick fog made driving dangerous
• Black ice meant I had to drive at 10mph
• High winds blew debris onto the road
• Lightning struck nearby, and we lost power

If you live quite close to work weather problems need to be really localised,  For those with a longer daily commute you can tell your colleagues anything.

You thought it was your work-from-home day.

I am researching this piece by being persistently late to the office. Each day is a new challenge to find the right reason to give the boss.

Good luck with your excuse.

Or you could take the whole day off instead of being late.