Lipstick Humor - The Trouble With Lipstick
A friend is having a write about lipstick competition. I don’t know what it’s about apart from lipstick obviously. Why not carburettors? I know nothing about them either — but it’s more my ballpark.
Have I a clue about lipstick? What do you think. That’s a rhetorical question. It means — no I don’t.
I know ladies use it and probably the ones who pretend… but you can’t say that can you? Play dress up then, is that OK? I can feel the censors sharpening their special censor pens right now.
Start again.
Have I a clue about lipstick? What do you think. That’s a rhetorical question. It means — no I don’t.
I know ladies use it and probably the ones who pretend… but you can’t say that can you? Play dress up then, is that OK? I can feel the censors sharpening their special censor pens right now.
Start again.
I know ladies use it. Goes on their lips. Probably hellishly expensive. Cosmetics. Rip off. Tested on animals. Hilarious.
This is going well.
I wonder how they test it? Grab a rabbit and whack some red lipstick on its mouth? Used to be a thing we cared about — testing on animals. We only seem to care about stupid stuff now.
Like covering farmland with windmills. Genius idea. Ripping up the sea bed for cobalt. If no one sees you do it then it doesn’t matter. You have to destroy the planet to save it. Trust the government and big business. What happened to people? Did they stop noticing?
This is going well.
I wonder how they test it? Grab a rabbit and whack some red lipstick on its mouth? Used to be a thing we cared about — testing on animals. We only seem to care about stupid stuff now.
Like covering farmland with windmills. Genius idea. Ripping up the sea bed for cobalt. If no one sees you do it then it doesn’t matter. You have to destroy the planet to save it. Trust the government and big business. What happened to people? Did they stop noticing?
They used to call women with too much make up — painted ladies. My grandmother made my teenage mother scrub her face with soap when she caught her going out with lipstick on. Times change.
As a man, the thing I most admire about lipstick is the mechanism. You turn the bottom and the lippy appears. It’s a neat thing. Pleasing in a mechanical fashion. They keep this tool, and a hundred others, in a handbag.
In my younger days I liked women who didn’t wear make-up. Don’t know why. Just how I was. I didn’t wash or cut my hair — they didn’t wear make-up. A quid pro quo.
I did once wear lipstick. It was applied for me. To me. My girlfriend and her sister made me up with all their makeup. Lipstick, eye-liner, stuff I don’t know what it’s called. It was around the time of David Bowie. I was up for anything back then. Probably lucky to get home in one piece thinking about it. Took some time to wash off.
As a man, the thing I most admire about lipstick is the mechanism. You turn the bottom and the lippy appears. It’s a neat thing. Pleasing in a mechanical fashion. They keep this tool, and a hundred others, in a handbag.
In my younger days I liked women who didn’t wear make-up. Don’t know why. Just how I was. I didn’t wash or cut my hair — they didn’t wear make-up. A quid pro quo.
I did once wear lipstick. It was applied for me. To me. My girlfriend and her sister made me up with all their makeup. Lipstick, eye-liner, stuff I don’t know what it’s called. It was around the time of David Bowie. I was up for anything back then. Probably lucky to get home in one piece thinking about it. Took some time to wash off.
Pausing to reread the rules. Any genre. That will do. Continuing.
The cosmetic industry should probably be shut down. Investigated. Held to account. Animal testing for sure. Overpricing, absolutely. Dangerous chemicals, certainly.
Connected with Big Pharma I guess. Largely untouchable. As soon as a significant case looks like it’s going to win a settlement — they shut down that part of the company. Rename, rebrand, profits secure.
In the UK we have a chain called Boots. They sell cosmetics and medicines. Perfumes too. I am slightly allergic to perfumes. Entering their shops, they are all identical, is like breathing poison. Same with perfume counters in department stores. All at cartel profits.
Consumers have a tremendous power to affect outcomes. If they worked together and stopped buying this stuff it would be magnificent. Would save money too.
Men buy perfumes these days. But not so much lipstick. Not yet. Only a matter of time.
The cosmetic industry should probably be shut down. Investigated. Held to account. Animal testing for sure. Overpricing, absolutely. Dangerous chemicals, certainly.
Connected with Big Pharma I guess. Largely untouchable. As soon as a significant case looks like it’s going to win a settlement — they shut down that part of the company. Rename, rebrand, profits secure.
In the UK we have a chain called Boots. They sell cosmetics and medicines. Perfumes too. I am slightly allergic to perfumes. Entering their shops, they are all identical, is like breathing poison. Same with perfume counters in department stores. All at cartel profits.
Consumers have a tremendous power to affect outcomes. If they worked together and stopped buying this stuff it would be magnificent. Would save money too.
Men buy perfumes these days. But not so much lipstick. Not yet. Only a matter of time.
Lipstick will continue. But not carburettors. Part of the doomed combustion engine. I’m going the way of the dinosaurs. They didn’t wear lipstick. Except for the pretty ones.