Here is a page of funny, cute and occasionally clever puns about Narrowboats. 

Original and humorous content with some fun illustrations too.

For anyone who enjoys canal life for holidays, living on a boat or just walking along the towpath taking it in.

Let's cast off and cruise into some peaceful puns.

all female crew - The Tiller Girls
back of the boat for a stern talking to
broad in the beam - loose hips sink ships

​captain speaking - cruising at 0 feet height, 4 miles per hour
celebrate successful docking - happy berth day
departed captain is no moor

disagreement mid-canal - argy-bargy
ex canal boat had a good wake
​fought with the cabin boy - decked him

​nice girls - Norfolk Broads
religious boating sect - Moormons
singing bawdy sea-shanty - crew ditty

​sex-mad skipper is expert in canal knowledge
​shared narrowboat holidays - hull is other people
​successfully moored - take a bow

​tangled ropes - knot my problem

all aboard - get on
all hands on deck - everyone pull their weight
land ahoy! - let's not overdo this, it's a canal, the land is normally within a few feet either side

Mary J. Bilge - singer
​Tom Cruise - actor
​A Tiller The Hun - King of the Huns
​
​Roger Moor - ex James Bond actor
Pontius Pilot - Roman official
​Howard Stern - old shock-jock

Cabin Fever - horror
​Lock - Tom Hardy
​Three Men in a Boat - Jerome K. Jerome

​Waterworld - Kevin Costner
​Wind River - Jeremy Renner

Two best days in a boat owners life?
The day he buys it, and the day he sells it

eBarge - bargain barge equipment
FaceBoat - keep up with fellow navigators
Instacram - cram everyone on, take selfies

Knotflix - movies for the water
Knotify - music as you downstream
Mooreddit - like Reddit but with ropes

​OnlyBeams - for committed boating fans
RopedIn - careers for captains of industry
Tiller - swipe through possible cabin mates

Wakeipedia - all you need to know

Flat Bottomed Girls - Queen
Messing About On The River - Josh Macrae
​Starboard to Heaven - Led Zeppelin
​
The Boatman - Levellers
The Erie Canal - Bruce Springsteen

Here is a list of handy words for making up narrowboat puns. 

ahoy, barge, beam, berth, bilge, boat, bow, cabin, canal, canal boat, captain, cast off, crew, cruising, deck, draft, galley, hull, knot, lock, moor, mooring, narrowboat, pilot, port, propeller, river, rudder, skipper, starboard, stern, tiller, towpath, wake, water

I hope you had a pleasant, if slow, journey through the calm waters of a few puns.

Now it is time to return to the hustle and bustle of normal internet life.