The Metasaurus - The Last Dinosaur
Scientists have recently dug up the only known Metasaur — the last of the dinosaurs. A truly terrifying beast with an oddly large brain for a dinosaur.
So not just teeth and claws. Intelligent, too. Too intelligent.
So not just teeth and claws. Intelligent, too. Too intelligent.
The Last Metasaur
When the dinosaurs died out, they seemed curiously unprepared. Mammals got their shit together. So did fish and other things that a naturalist would know about.
I am not a naturalist. Only on weekends, with the curtains mostly closed.
Scientists have pontificated. It’s what they do. They are paid to do it. I wish I was. This material is provided free of charge.
They think the poor old Metasaurus was aware of impending doom. They can tell this by measuring footprints and making up a story. National Geographic prints the story, and it becomes fact.
While the other dinosaurs carried on doing dino stuff — ripping, tearing, roaring — they didn’t consider loftier matters. Meta did.
I am not a naturalist. Only on weekends, with the curtains mostly closed.
Scientists have pontificated. It’s what they do. They are paid to do it. I wish I was. This material is provided free of charge.
They think the poor old Metasaurus was aware of impending doom. They can tell this by measuring footprints and making up a story. National Geographic prints the story, and it becomes fact.
While the other dinosaurs carried on doing dino stuff — ripping, tearing, roaring — they didn’t consider loftier matters. Meta did.
Meta talked to himself, there being a distinct lack of other intelligent company. “Is there a higher being?,” would be a typical thought. He would strike a pose: one giant clawed hand under his chin, while the other arm was behind his back.
“Where are you, God?,” he would cry in anguish.
The other dinosaurs avoided Meta. Who wants to get involved in all that intelligent business when there are better things to do? Live for the moment — that’s the natural world.
Science has decided that Meta was the last of the great dinosaurs. It seems he deliberately walked into a tar pit and awaited his fate. Did he know something was about to go down?
We will never know the full extent of Meta’s awareness until Jurassic Park 27 comes out. If his soul is still around after millions of years, maybe he will appreciate it.
“Fame at last,” he will think. “Too late, as always.”
“Where are you, God?,” he would cry in anguish.
The other dinosaurs avoided Meta. Who wants to get involved in all that intelligent business when there are better things to do? Live for the moment — that’s the natural world.
Science has decided that Meta was the last of the great dinosaurs. It seems he deliberately walked into a tar pit and awaited his fate. Did he know something was about to go down?
We will never know the full extent of Meta’s awareness until Jurassic Park 27 comes out. If his soul is still around after millions of years, maybe he will appreciate it.
“Fame at last,” he will think. “Too late, as always.”