Water Puns

Fish swim in it, Jesus walked on it and some people drink it when the bars are shut.

Fortunately the river banks never close, except on Sundays, so this page has been developed to see if there is any humor lurking beneath the surface.

Water makes up 60% of our bodies and is ok as a milk substitute when taking a bath.

Surely there is something funny about it too?

Let's dive in to some water puns.
Humorous Lead A Horse To Water design features the old proverb illustrated by a farmer encouraging his horse to take a drink. The horse eyes the water and says

Lead A Horse To Water Gifts >>

Puns

another downpour - floody hell
arrested for stealing a bucket - can you make bail?
beavers blocked the river again - dam

borrow some seawater to tide you over
buy wet goods from the Amazon
​dry day - Thirstday

freeze the sea - stop m'ocean
moptops - Beatles haircuts
​run down pool is a bit of a dive

stood in the river for live streaming
tap stuck, call a plumber - don't faucet
tide went out - don't forget to wave

​three holes in the road - well, well, well
water company went under - needed a bailout
which sea - be more Pacific

​​​write an ode to water with a fountain pen​

Expressions

Never rains but it pours - slightly pessimistic outlook on life
Pour oil on troubled waters - create instant eco disaster
Still waters run deep - there may be plenty going on beneath the surface

​Thin as a yard of pump water - a skinny person
​Time and tide wait for no man - inevitability
​Water, water, everywhere / Nor any drop to drink - from the Rime of the Ancient Mariner
Cry Me a River design features hand written lettering with crying eyes above and a river of tears below.

Cry Me A River Gifts >>

Films

Jaws - don't go in the water
Ocean's Eleven - crime brat pack
Pail Rider - Clint Eastwood

​Reservoir Dogs - Tarantino pours it on
​​Shape of Water - it's flat obviously
Titanic - disaster movie

Waterworld - Costner project
​Wind River - not much wind or river, lots of snow

Joke

"It's raining cats and dogs out there"
"I know, I just stepped into a poodle"

People

Dick Van Dyke - actor
Flow-Jo - track and field superstar
​Billy Ocean - singer

River Phoenix - actor
Joan Rivers - comic
​Brooke Shields - actress

Bruce Springsteen - rocker
​Muddy Waters - blues player
A kung fu and protest inspired design, Be Like Water features the slogan with a leaping kung fu expert above it. Be Like Water and be flexible, especially when dealing with tough situations.

Be Like Water Gifts >>

Social Media

eBail - cheap mops and buckets
FaceBrook - keep up with friends
Icestagram - influencers sell bottled water

SinkedIn - career taking a dive?
Spiltify - music while you clean up
Waterpedia - all you need to stay afloat

​Wetflix - soggy movies
YouTub - videos of floating foolery

Songs

Bridge Over Troubled Water - Simon and Garfunkel
Moon River - Audrey Hepburn
​Smoke on the Water - Deep Purple

Surfin' USA - Beach Boys
There's A Hole In My Bucket - Harry Belafonte
​Walking on Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves
​
​When the Levee Breaks - Led Zeppelin
Plumbing design shows a plumber fixing a leaky pipe. Plumbing is a key building trade and one of the essential emergency services. Fortunately our plumber knows exactly what to do.

Plumber Gifts >>

Words for Making Water Puns

A handy set of words for water punning.

​bail, bucket, dam, drain, drip, faucet, float, flood, flow, freeze, ice, lake, leak, levee, liquid, mop, ocean, pail, rain, reservoir, ripple, river, sea, sink, soggy, sopping, stream, submerge, tap, tide, thirst, water, waterfall, wave, well, wet

Water Shortage

With a watery eye it is time to turn the taps off.

An immediate water pun ban has been imposed in order to conserve stocks at the local reservoir of soggy gags.

To be resumed during the next monsoon.